Thursday, September 14, 2006

"Let Me Introduce Myself" by The Cat That Would Be Heard


My name is Theodore (though the family has always called me Teddy) Really now, do I look like a teddy to you? In my experience, teddies are for small children and dogs to carry around. Nevertheless, I am 19 years of age in cat years. In human years that makes me 92.

Why would an old geezer like me want to try his paw at writing, you may ask?
Well aside from eating, taking small walks outside and sleeping more than I used to, and the occasional margarita, I`ve become interested in this blogging thing that`s been keeping my mistress so busy lately. I`ve decided to call my writings "by the cat that would be heard" due to never being heard through these long years. Much to my chagrin, I`ve been blessed with a very soft voice. Most times, unfortunately, my mouth will open and nothing, absolutely nothing comes out. Terribly humiliating. The only way of coping was to tear my way in and out of the house through the screen. Unpleaseant, but how else is one to handle such a situation? It upset the mistress to the point where she put this wonderful flap in the window for self serve. Lovely woman!

Life just hasn`t been what it used to be though. No more romping through the grass and sneaking throught the field to catch mice or the odd bird. What joy that brought to me. But alas, I`m afraid those days are over.

I did fool the master and mistress though, a few weeks ago. They think I caught a baby rabbit and brought it into the house through the cat flap. Ha! It was actually Angus who found that prize, but the little fellow got away from him.
I thought it would be jolly good fun to chase it and make it look like it was mine. One still has some pride you know.
Yes, Angus will be taking over for me one day and I must get after that boy from time to time. He tends to be slightly on the dopey side you know.

Well, I`ve tired myself out getting up in this chair, so I shall say hasta que satisfacemos otra vez, or until we meet again.

Theodore

If anyone is interested, the below link is where I found my human age.
http://cats.about.com/cs/healthissues/a/agechart.htm

19 comments:

miss*R said...

yep - you are right about what a hedgewitch is!
this post of yours is entertaining :)

Jeanne said...

I love that picture and an Aristocat for sure.
Love Her Furrness!

Giggles =^..^=

Gary said...

I love that picture.

I had a dog that loved bringing his trophies into my bedroom for me to admire. What's up with that?

Shelley said...

How funny. Love the pic. One of my cats talks. Really he does. When he can't find us he walks around the house saying "hello" and when he does, he starts shouting "out!! Out!!!" Works every time.

Janet said...

I love this!! Theodore, you are fantastic! Just don't drink too many margaritas at your age.

LuLu, one of our cats, "talks" to us but Harley has just a tiny meow for being such a macho cat!

FarmgirlCyn said...

Theodore, you must meet Kissy Face, She is a tad younger than you, perhaps around 11 or 12. But, age is merely a number, and she has a lot of life left in her! (love the photo!)

Naturegirl said...

Dear Theadore:
I thought we could become friends.I thought I was the the feline STAR of the internet but I see that AGE comes before beauty!Ok I"ll share the spotlight with you. You romped through fields while I continue to be master..um...mistress gardener with naturegirl.She allows me out into the garden with her.I chase butterflies and frogs.Yes frogs no sillier that YOU CATCHING RABBITS! Oh naturegirl would NOT allow that!! Come on over to nature-trail and see charming little
me.. Paisley and my sister Babie.
Your furball friend
Paisley

vicci said...

I love this story...and that cat is a doll!!! That young Boy!!!! I ADORE the photo!!!!!!

Daisy Lupin said...

Hi to you Teddy, I may call you Teddy, or should I be polite and call you Theodore? Prehaps, Theodore as you are a cat of venerable age and attitude. I am sure you must have a fund of stories to tell about your younger days, you have that kind of look in your eyes.Bet you chases the kitty girls,you old rogue. I hope you keep enjoying a luxurious old age. xx

PG said...

Mr Theodore, what a dignified and exclusive cat you are. A perfect example of how tabbies age gracefully. And handsome too. :)

Rosa said...

How refreshing to hear from you Theadore! May you have many, many years or restfulness ahead of you. And what a writer you are. Look at you drinking your Marg. Sweet!

Rowan said...

How nice to meet you Theodore,may I say that you carry your years very lightly. Hope the margarita didn't give you too much of a hangover!

One Crabapple said...

omg - this is brilliant

I loved this start to finish and every word in between.

oh this was a DELIGHT !!!

Thank you ! Love, S.

Stjernesol said...

Wonderful writing :)

Kilroy_60 said...

I think that's what you call a pussy with attitude! Great choice for the FREE FOR ALL carnival.

What might you think about hosting a carnival with an animal theme?

Heather in Beautiful British Columbia said...

Teddy is one cool cat! I'll be right over to join him for a margarita :)

Usha said...

I had never thought i liked cats or could like them. Theodore changed my mind!

Stargazer said...

Dear Theodore,

Do you mind me asking if you have a standard or ergonomic keyboard? Our neighbor's cat, Snowbell, has been trying to start a blog herself, but can't seem to get anything more interesting than this....

aldk alfjk jkladf ozcviu;ljkew ejklwet ;lkdlfdf;d l;fdfdgpos fkl;fgd lf;d klsf lfd;rpogasdfa;l;f f

;0)

BTW, I love your picture!

Janey Loree said...

I love cats and yours are all special! And Elvis too!

Found this post by way of the FREE FOR ALL Gonzo Blog Carnival!!! Great post and pictures!!!