Sunday, August 12, 2007

"A Rather Old Man and His Fur Coat" by The Cat That Would Be Heard


Well here I am. I must say, it has been awhile since I`ve put my paw to type. My sincere apologies to you all. Unabashedly I shall say that Ive gone into retirement, yet find myself feeling an old urge pulling me t`wards the keys. No memories this time, but a tale of pure embarassment. The difference will be, I`m sorry to say ( forgive me, mistress) tis my own embarassment this turn, not my dear mistress as you shall shortly view. Why would I subject myself to baring my humiliation to all, you might wonder? For lack of anything much else to say I`m afraid really.
If you have not had the pleasure of meeting me ago, please feel free to, by magic of the internet, point your mouse here....ahhhhhhhhh mouse...such memories that word brings me of long ago days, hunting in the fields. But I digress...point your mouse here if you are at all curious to know this old blighter http://teaandmargaritas.blogspot.com/2006/09/let-me-introduce-myself-by-cat-that_14.html

Yes....here I am having one of my usual and quite frequent naps these days. Twenty being ninety three in your human years. All of a sudden I was asaulted with a comb. As you may have noticed, my fur is no longer as smooth and shiny as it once was. Ah yes, I was quite handsome in my younger days. But now to my great disdain, I am but a shadow of my former glory, thin and covered with the most bothersome and rather shabby and matted fur coat.

But alas, praise be, I am still quite healthy and tend to be much more affectionate in these twilight years. Ahhhhh, that did feel very nice indeed....

I will admit that a nice combing under the chin was quite as good as a rub...

But hark, things quickly began to deteriorate....

I found myself feeling quite edgey about all the hair coming out...

Thankfully the mistress realized this as well and left the other half for another day. Now, why is this such an embarassment you might ask? If per chance, you had this much of your own precious hair sitting in a pile on the floor, would not your own sensibilities be affected?


So, there you have it. I have settled my inner urge to write, be it wanting in any good quality or no. It is done and now I shall go back and retire to my chair and bid you all, if God but choose "voor wij weerleggen weer" or "until we meet again."

Theodore~

33 comments:

Sheila said...

Theodore, my own late and beloved cats were in their twentieth year when they went to Rainbow Bridge. Being long haired and less than agile, they often neglected their grooming, and I was put in the dubious position of 'cat grromer'. They were not impressed either when the piles of matted hair grew, and they too worried that they would end up hairless (like those , if I may dare say, unattractive Egyptian creatures..!)
I feel your pain, but I'm sure your mistress has your best interests at heart. Nice to hear from you again..xo

Sheila said...

Thanks for the good wishes TEA..!
I just published the above comment when your comment to me came in..LOL

Kari said...

This made me laugh out loud. And yes, when I saw a similar size pile of my hair on the floor of the beauty shop, I too was a little put out! lol

Mrs. G said...

I had to drag Mr G away from watching raise the titanic to see Mr. Theodore :)

Mr G & I both think Teddy looks swell to be 20 :) Our Old Man Kitty Beauregard passed away last month at 19...I still miss him...unlike Teddy, Beauregard was a Screamer...good grief...but what a love :) he had sort of let his groomin' habits go too...so he often got, in addition to a good combing, a bath...which he tolerated fairly well...

anyhooo....a Big Huge to Teddy :)

Christine of Epiphany said...

Hahahahahahaha!
That was great!

farmingfriends said...

Hi Theodore!
Sorry to hear of your embarrassment. I hope you enjoyed the combing once you got over the embarrassing hairloss!
It was good to meet you and hope to hear more of your cat tales soon.
PS. Tea - I loved this story - what a clever way to tell us about Theodore.
Sara from farmingfriends

Gimme a sign said...

Could have been worse, Theodore. Your mistress could have taken the electric razor to you. Be thankful.

Tricia said...

hahaha! Tea, that was very entertaining! i hope my kitties make it to 93!

The Thrifty Blogger said...

Oh Theodore, but what a lovely mistress you have! Assaulted by your mistress with a comb? You haven't been into those margaritas again, have you? :)

Julie Marie said...

Dear Theodore,

My own sweet Dusty lived to be 18 1/2. Her beautiful coat suffered toward the end, and I think she was embarrassed about it. Mom (me) actually had to cut hunks of matted hair out. That wasn't fun for either of us!

Julie

tash said...

Give Theodore a cuddle from me - what a sweetie to have his fur brushed like that! We gave our dog a bath the other day, for no other reason that she hadn't had one for ages (but she's not a smelly dog at all) and it's Summer, so she could dry off in the garden. She doesn't like the water, whatever temperature you get it but *loves* being towel-dried and then blow-dried - bliss!

Mary said...

Oh
The indignities we subject our cats to. Our 3 are getting old and dont groom as well as they should. We when brush Hammish he gets this really cross patch look on his face Its very funny to see I will have to take a picture of him

Rowan said...

Theodore, I certainly would feel worried if that much of my hair was sitting in a pile beside me! It really was worth it though, you look positively young and handsome in the final photo. Happy dreams of mouses caught and large dishes of cream:) A Bientot!

Gillian @ Indigo Blue said...

Theodore, dahling...are you of an English persuasion? Your accent is so refined, so distinguished. Much like your beautifully groomed coat. No need to feel embarrassed. A combed cat is a happy cat, yes?
You are adorable!!!
xo
Blue

Raven said...

Theodore has nice eyes =)

Paper Fan Club said...

Theodore, I liked the picture of you getting combed under your chin. I think I heard the purring through my monitor...

Pearl C. Pritchard said...

Theodore...

do not worry about your hair. Believe me, there's plenty more where that came from. Let her comb you and ask her to give you a little massage while she's at it.

love, Pearl.

jessica said...

love the story telling.
very sweet.
hugs to theodore.

Cottage Smallholder said...

Hi Theodore,

In the UK one cat year is equivalent to seven human years. So you are 140 years old!

I think that you look very elegant after your combing.

PG said...

Handsome boy after his grooming - what a classy fellow!

Rosa said...

Awwww. Sooo cute. I have one that needs grooming badly!

david santos said...

Belo gato. Muchas gracias.

Sir James Beiggelschwarz said...

Don't retire. Please. We need you!

carolyn said...

Theodore you are a very handsome chap.

Home Away from Home. said...

You're beautiful, even if your fur is a bit mussed up. Enjoy your rest.

Palm Springs Savant said...

Teddy- I know just how you feel. My dad Rick tried to run that ridiculous comb through my fur. It feel good for awhile but he does insist on overdoing it. He doesn't know but I'm using his computer right now to leave you this post!
-Owen (the orange tabby Persian monster cat)

Kahshe Cottager said...

What a handsome boy you are Master Theodore! No comb-over for you!

One Crabapple said...

Ah Sweet and Distiguished Theo

I dare say the cut makes you look younger and thus all the more dapper !

Miss Daisy quite agrees and she is in her eighteenth year and goes thru the same
Autracity !

However , it does seem to limber one up and get the blood back to the skin again - very nice for a summer such as this too !

You Green Eyes still have the power to mesmerize Dearest.

So glad to hear from you !
xo- S.

One Crabapple said...

Tea- What a sweety pie that old Theodore is.

I know you worry. I think he looks pretty good tho.

Scratch that old puss under the chin for me.

(wonderful storytime theater here ! Do do it again and again !)

Love, S

HAR said...

Theodore,
I think you look puurfect! Sorry to write such rubbish. Relax and take it easy Theo, you earned it.
Snuggles McBoo

gledwood said...

WOW!¬! Now THAT is a Senior Citizen cat..! Reminds me of one blonging to an X of mine... he had a head like a rugby ball (American football) and even though he was close to 20 years old once they moved house he STILL beat up EVERY SINGLE OTHER CAT on his new road... sat down purring to himself afterwards... And he WAS old he passed into that mousery in the sky a year or so after that which just goes to show how tough he really was beating up all them other cats like that...

btw was he actually drinking outta that straw? Or was that an Apple Mac style mockup??

Pearl Maple - Mandy Collins said...

You have such a delightful blog here. The pictures of kitty grooming and his commentary are so funny.

The garden & birdhouses are a lovely taste of your neighborhood. I am a Canadian currently living a long way from home and they brightened my day.

Cristina said...

Teddy, you are still such a handsome fellow, please don't be too distressed about being a bit mature. And it's much nicer for mummy to comb a little fur off than to cough it up, isn't it?